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And now give us the 'Register of Corruption

Republic - March 15, 2010 Page 1 Section: FRONT PAGE

The first year of 'Ice Age does not bring luck to the government. A poor government, which employs most of the time to save himself and his proteges. That they must devise decrees, awards, patches and workarounds to cover illegal. That has to invent a law per week to defend a trembling premieruccio that does not have the courage to face trials. Stefano Benni A government that is to avoid jail dozens of suspects, cover up bribes and brothels, illegal voter resurrect, heal evaders who bring money to 'foreign condoning false accounting and accidents at work, and then criticize the journalists not welcome. How to find the time to organize things as important as the Messina Bridge, the new pyramid Arcore and Christmas gifts for Putin? Definitive measures are being considered to put an end to this waste of energy. The anticipate: Decree SSS: Silvio Salvo Always. To achieve this superdecreto that will rescue the 'little man trembling from red robes, Ghedini has convened a committee of international experts, who go to the magician Copperfield lawyers to Cosa Nostra. Finally she found a simple solution. After such failure, here is a legitimate conflict. The conflict of interest, at the base of many problems, will no longer be a crime but a virtue. Will be added to the Constitution the following article in one paragraph: "L 'Italy is a republic founded on the double work of the' current prime minister." Whenever the judiciary will detect a conflict of interest, not only have to sketch, but it will work for the prosperity of the conflict. Therefore, by the 'year will comprise the RAI and Berlusconi's Mediaset elect directly to the judges of the Constitutional Court, which has become fifteen Capezzone. Creation of the 'Roll of the corrupt. As there is a guild of doctors and lawyers and so on, exist to pursue a professional legal corruption. To subscribe, you will need to have already undergone a few major convictions, or be presented by an old associate corruptor. Of course, you can also bribe the admissions committee. In this way, any recruiter and whores, showing the 'special card, can corrupt without risk. But beware of false identification cards! C 'is dishonest people around who could forge. Restyling of unemployment. The economic crisis is a thorn in the government and the workers are protesting a bad show. It is useless to change the words. Calling the layoffs turn-over, bench, stand-by spare resources, it serves to hide the tragic situation. There 's only one way to solve the problem, ie to create the crime of unemployment, according to a trick used recently against the immigrants. The unemployed can find work and apply to be hired, but when it comes from these master and found in flagrante delicto, has him arrested. The unemployed person may choose to go to jail, to migrate 'abroad or make a socially useful work, such as the punching bag for La Russa. You will see that the unemployed will stop flaunting their status. Television: It will set up the pax (aeterna) playing field. It was noted that the moderators are basically calm and peaceful people. Guests are politicians and journalists straparlano, argue, argue with their bad example and lead astray the moderator. With the pax condicio the moderator will only study the desert for the duration of the transmission. We'll see Vespa dozing in a chair, or while cleaning the dust, or shows his latest book. Santoro who reads the newspapers, combing her hair, laughing watching cartoons Vauro without showing to the public. You will hear soft music style lift, and no more dramatic markings. Instead of the guests there will be busts, screens with advertisements, pictures of tulips. If the 'audience to come down too, it is expected that every quarter' in the studio now enter a naked woman who reads poetry or Bondi, but not vice versa. Since we now impossible to disentangle the threads that tie mafia, economy and politics, will be established for the small amount Mafia decree. Legalizing all is too much, but with the small amount you can regulate the sector. An industrial example will recycle twenty percent of its budget, a politician can have friends but no more than ten mafia, a candidate may accept the votes of the Camorra, as long as we are not more than fifty per cent of the total . Instead of repenting, we will have fussy accountants. Electoral reform. The elections cost inveleniscono and every time the political climate. How this time that is irregular from the lists created the mess you know. In a democracy, nobody should rejoice if the list Polverini may not be voted. But when where the 'little man and his worshipers speak of "conspiracy and abuse of power" to stop a moment to think of migrant workers without the right to vote, and citizens who have to invent ways to make each day tiring to hear their reasons, with the privileges the propaganda machine, and the bombardment of television commercials. Poor governance and poor parts, trouble losing a single euro on the repayment of the billions of election expenses! But the case has sharpened the minds Polverini, and is already preparing a big order for the future, legitimate court. It works like this: each time the current government has a list of irregular, then protest that you can vote in these conditions, then threatens, indeed calls for a climate of violence, then postpone the elections and for referral back to court you do not vote for more than fifty years. It was so easy to think about it. Finally we arrive at a sore point. Napolitano could use its role as impartial block these initiatives. But Napolitano, ultimately, does not want trouble. Everybody pulled his jacket and nervous and it is not nice to have a President stressed. Napolitano then still retain its representative functions, but for the by-laws will be replaced by a 'special validation machine situated at the' entrance Quirinal Bancolex said. Just in case of urgency that the government representatives, even at night, go to the car, infilino the decree, and it will be stamped and signed in no time. To make it more dignified to the sides of Bancolex cuirassiers there will be two, or the two robots from Star Wars. - by Stefano Benni